Se Habla Espanol!

There's only one thing that can prompt me to write after my month long hiatus. Infomercials. I love them! I don't know how they suck me in, they just do. The hosts make everything look so appetizing and appealing, like it's something you just can't live without. Usually infomercials play during the late hours of the morning, but you won't find me up at 2 am watching infomercials. If they're playing at 2 in the afternoon, you can bet I'll pause in my channel searching to see what's being sold. I love the Bender Ball. It's guaranteed to be 408% more effective than ordinary crunches! How did they even get that percentage?! However, my all time favorite infomercial is The Magic Bullet.
I pause all action to watch. After years and years of watching this infomercial, I still get a kick out of it. With characters like Berman who just wake up with an apparent hangover, to Fred and Ike with significant others, to my favorite, the crotchety old woman, Hazel that has a cigarette about to fall out of her mouth, what's not to love! Not to mention the male host has some kind of Australian accent and the woman looks like she needs to be on a yacht.
The best part of this whole story is that last night I got to see The Magic Bullet infomercial in Spanish! That's right, it was in espanol. I learned that in cinco segundo I can have fresh salsa or in diez segundo, I can have guacamole! That's half the stuff you need for a fiesta!
Every time I see this infomercial I say to myself, "Self, why haven't you bought one of these yet? What are you waiting for?" Alas, the time is just not right. No bueno.

Love Lockdown

Kayne's new music video...Love Lockdown . Love the song and beat. But don't get the video. Why so tribal? Your thoughts?

Fruit Good.Cake Great.Fruit Cake?Nasty Crap.

I don't get people's obsession with fruitcake. What's good about it? Nothing. I visited the Hurricane Pioneer Museum a couple of months ago and saw a 100-year old preserved fruitcake? WHY? What would possess someone to want to preserve a fruitcake? According to wikipedia, fruitcake is "a cake made with chopped candied fruit and/or dried fruit, nuts and spices, and optionally soaked in spirits. Fruitcakes are often served in the celebration of weddings and Christmas." I guess people like it because it's typically drenched in spirits. But what bride would have something like that at her wedding. Give me a chocolate cake rich in icing any day! I also learned from our somewhat trusty souce wikipedia, that "starting in the 16th century, inexpensive sugar from the American Colonies, and the discovery that high concentrations of sugar could preserve fruits, created an excess of candied fruit, thus making fruitcakes more affordable and popular." I still think that no matter how much sugar you use, fruitcakes should be banned. Here's some facts about fruitcake to think about....47-Percentage of people who say they’d toss a holiday fruitcake in the trash without delay

11-Percentage of people who say they would make time to re-gift a fruitcake

25-Years that fruitcakes can age and still be enjoyed, as long as they have the right preservatives and are stored in tightly closed tins

2,952-Pounds of fruitcake delivered to U.S. troops in Iraq for the holidays last year

25 years! Who wants to eat a 25 year old fruitcake?!

I leave you with one of my favorite comedians, Jim Gaffigan, talking about cake. Enjoy!

Bad Signs

One of my biggest pet peeves is when something is either misspelled or the wrong word is used! However, this is pretty funny, given the context. Taken at St. George's own Holiday Inn. I passed this sign on two different days and it still hadn't been changed. I couldn't resist taking a picture. It totally made my day! Awesome!

"Last Christmas"

This song is really starting to drive me nuts! I think it all began when Karyn called me from Hawaii's Iolani Palace and as she was walking or in a store or somewhere, this song came on and she started singing it. It's one of those songs that gets stuck in your head. Much like "It's a Small World..." Anyways, it seems like everywhere I go, this song is playing. I didn't really know what the lyrics were except for "Last Christmas I gave you my heart/but the very next day you ripped it apart." Okay, so those aren't the EXACT words--they're the words that I would've sung. I think they're more melodious. And this song has been sung by everyone: George Michael, Ashley Tisdale, Jimmy Eat World, Savage Garden, and Wham!. I can't remember giving anyone quite a gift as my heart, only to have them give it away. Have you? The actual lyrics are below:

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart
But the very next day you gave it away
This year, to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart
But the very next day you gave it away
This year, to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone
I'll give it to someone special

Once bitten and twice shy
I keep my distance, but you still catch my eye
Tell me baby, do you recognize me?

Well it's been a year, it doesn't surprise me

Happy Christmas
I wrapped it up and sent it
With a note saying "I love
you", I meant it
Now I know what a fool I've been
But if you kissed me now, I
know you'd fool me again

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart
But the very next day you gave it away
This year, to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart
But the very next day you gave it away
This year, to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special
Special
Yea yea

A crowded room, friends with tired eyes
I'm hiding from you, and your soul of ice
I thought you were someone to rely on
Me, I guess I was a shoulder to cry on

A face unlovin', with a fire in her heart
A man under cover but you tore me apart
Now I've found a real love,
you'll never fool me again

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart
But the very next day you gave it away
This year, to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart
But the very next day you gave it away
This year, to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart
But the very next day you gave it away
This year, to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special

I'll give it to someone special

Chiropractors Make...

Better Lovers. I saw that scrawled on a bumper sticker as I was driving to work this morning. I got such a crack out of it! To accompany the words, there was a picture of an curved spine. Does that mean it's because they're more bendy and get kinks out? ;) I wonder how many more bumper stickers are out there that relate to a person's profession?

The One With...

I love the Thanksgiving 'Friends' episodes! They're my absolute favorite. Oh, besides the Gilmore Girls episode where Lorelai and Rory go to four Thanksgivings (you can't forget the tofurkey!) How well do you know them? I can't take credit for this, I found it online via TV Guide. Enjoy! ;)

How well do you know the ‘Friends’ Thanksgiving episodes?

Thanksgiving signals that wonderful time of year when family and friends get together to appreciate the things we have — not to mention stuffing our faces full of yummy turkey goodness! No TV show exemplifies this better than Friends, as every year the gang would gather to feast on one of Monica’s outstanding meals — and get into a few mishaps along the way!
See how well you remember their hilarious holiday shenanigans with this Thanksgiving quiz. Good luck!
1. One Thanksgiving afternoon, the gang decided to play a pick-up game of football in the park. What was the name of the trophy Ross and Monica were fighting over?
2. Ross, Rachel, Phoebe and Joey all arrived late to Thanksgiving dinner. What did Monica and Chandler do when they finally showed up?
3. Monica invited Will, an old friend, over for dinner. What’s the name of the club he started with Ross back in high school?
4. One year, Rachel’s sister Amy showed up for dinner. Which well-known actress portrayed her?
5. At dinner, Chandler is depressed over something that happened at Thanksgiving when he was a boy. What was it?
6. Phoebe developed a crush on one of Monica’s dinner guests. Who was it?
7. To make up for kissing Joey’s girlfriend, Kathy, what did Chandler do?
8. During dinner, Joey accidentally spilled the beans about Rachel’s love interest. Who was she pining for?
9. One Thanksgiving, Rachel decided to make a trifle. What recipe got mixed up with the dessert’s?
10. Monica has never burned Thanksgiving dinner. True or false?
(scroll down for answers)


ANSWERS:
1. The Geller Cup
2. Locked them out
3. We Hate Rachel
4. Christina Applegate
5. His parents’ divorce
6. Jack Geller
7. Spent Thanksgiving in a crate
8. Tag
9. Shepherd’s pie
10. False

SCORE:
0-3: Could you be any more forgettable?
4-7: Were you on a break from watching?
8-10: How you doin’? Awesome, that’s how!